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TAKE A DREAM
trip through Japan in the Honda CR-Z.
Anyone who thinks mankind is in charge of the world needs to look at what a simple cloud of ash did to our best-laid plans. As I wrote this, Mount Unpronounceable twice emptied the skies of planes and who knows what she might do in the future?
I happened to be staying in a London hotel the first time it happened. I'd been working flat-out and hadn't seen the news so I didn't know civilisation was collapsing around me as I checked in - just that reception seemed a bit busier than usual.
Then, as the receptionist went to hand me the key, this George Bush lookalike barged past me and tried to snatch it off me. Dressed in the normal Yank uniform of white trainers, oversized jeans and a shell-suit top, with a matching wife and two kids who looked like Augustus Gloop, this Tennessean fool demanded my room because his flight had been cancelled and he had nowhere else to sleep.
Rebecca the receptionist tried to explain through a torrent of spittle that he'd checked out this morning so he had no claim to my room. Since then they'd sold out, she said - but, as it happened, she had one cancellation she could offer him. That was more than I would have done - but even that didn't suit this piece of work.
He banged the desk and shouted that one room wasn't big enough for his family. Since they were roughly the size of a herd of African elephants, he had a point. Still, the banging snapped me out of my typical English reserve and I stepped between him and Rebecca to stop it escalating from a hoo-ha into a kerfuffle.
Wrong move. Now he was shouting at me, which brought another Brit in on my side, which was the signal for his wife to wade in, followed by 500kg of Big Mac-flavoured offspring. A major diplomatic incident was kicking off and that's not my bag so I stepped away holding my key, quoted Shakespeare - "My words fly up, but my thoughts remain below" - and disappeared, leaving them confused.
The thing is, I really feel for stranded travellers. It's happened to me enough times. If they'd been nicer, I would have offered them a lift to another hotel. Mind you, getting just one of them into this new Honda CR-Z would have been tough. Unlike American cars, it's not designed to hold a family of giant walruses - in fact it was designed to be the exact opposite of that gas-guzzling breed, because this is a hybrid. To be specific, "a sporty hybrid coupé" (you guys in South Africa will see it in showrooms in August, 2010).
That's a new one on me but if it means this sector is about to start diversifying then I'm all for it. The less boring they are the better off we'll be. The question is, can you really make a hybrid sporty?
The CR-Z's chief chassis engineer Terukazu Torikai says it was inspired by the Lotus Elise... yeah, right. It certainly turned a few heads on the drive back from London but to me it's more of a Mini or Megane-type sportiness than anything Lotus would put their name to.
OFF THE FREEWAY FOR FUN
The problem is the back end. I don't know why hybrids have to look like bread vans from the rear but the Toyota Prius, Honda's own Insight and this one all do - so let's concentrate on the front, which I think works really well. The sweeping line from the chin up over the bonnet and windscreen reduces drag but also works really well with the big tapering headlights and the slits low down in the bumper for the LED's.
The whole thing sits wide and low to the ground and, from the front, reminds me of a 125kW Seat Leon FR. Sadly, there are definitely not 125kW horses under this fella's bonnet. There are 83, plus about 10 from the electric motor.
It takes 10 seconds to go from 0-100 but it felt longer - and don't think about the top speed. If you left London on the M1 I reckon you'd pass Leicester by the time it managed it. Come off the freeway, however, and you see what they were trying to achieve.
With an electric motor helping, you get good, meaty low-down torque. So this is a lot of fun to fling in and out of roundabouts, with quick, positive steering and a nicely balanced chassis. Understeer is a bit of a problem but only when pushing hard. Sport mode sharpens the throttle response and gets you a bigger electric boost while the six-speed manual gearbox is light and lively. I don't know of any other manual hybrid, so that's a step forward.
I can imagine some future version of the CR-Z selling big-time to the boy racers who are currently in primary school.
There's a big boot and two decent seats at the back. In the front, a large central rev counter takes pride of place, changing colour as the engine speed increases: red for "think about the polar bears", blue for "the polar bears are OK" and green for "the polar bears wuv you".
MY BUNCH OF FLOWERS KEPT DYING
To drive the point home even more there's a digital garden that grows as you drive responsibly. That's a bit too much, if you ask me - as was the stop/start device, the bane of all eco cars. Every time I stopped at a light or a junction the engine cut out to save fuel. This meant I couldn't ride the clutch so I had to learn a whole new way of setting off. With cars beeping at me to get a move on, I couldn't manage it without giving it a heap of revs.
This defeated the object - my bunch of flowers kept dying - so I put it in Sport mode (I liked the red warning glow of the dash) and after that I lost interest. I really, really wanted to love this car as it looks good, it's C-charge exempt and I didn't fill it up once in an entire week, which was a first for this column.
It's definitely a step forward. If nothing else, the handling makes me excited about what Ferrari and Porsche are going to do with this technology. Oh yes, sporty hybrids are definitely here to stay. We'd all better get used to them or, like the family in reception, we'll be going nowhere.
TECH SPEC
UK price:
£16 999 (about R195 000).
Engine:
1.5-litre petrol-electric hybrid capable of 90kW (including 10kW from the electric motor) and 174Nm from 1500rpm.
Top speed:
200km.
Fuel consumption:
About five litres/100km.
CO2 emissions:
117g/km.
Transmission:
Six-speed manual.
Standard stuff:
16in alloy rims, ABS with EBD and EBA, vehicle stability assist, hill-start assist, three-mode drive system (Sport/Normal/Eco), gearshift indicator, four-speaker CD/radio, power adjustable and heatable door mirrors, LED daytime running lights.
Optional stuff:
17in alloy rims, cruise control, glass roof, ambient lighting, heatable front seats, rain sensor, dusk sensor, tweeters and sub-woofer, iPod connectivity, voice recognition DVD, satnav, Bluetooth, rear parking sensors, HID lights with auto levelling, powered door mirrors, fog lights, 240W audio.